News

Next Thursday (April 30th), the Canoe and Canoe Polo clubs shall be hosting their annual elections. The most fair and democractic event ever to be held will becoming to a laptop near you. We will be meeting on the holiest of sites, Zoom for about 8:30. 

Formal attire is ABSOLUTELY REQUIRED, just beacuse we are at home does not mean you cannot put the effort in.

If you are running for an executive role, don’t forget to prepare a song (the exec were bullied into this) and a joke, both of which must be performed on the night.

Each club has received presidential nominees, so get ready folks and prepare:

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CANOE

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Mr Owen Kelly

We are at war with faff, I intend to provide a comprehensive strategy to reduce faff within the club.

• The formation of Warwick Students Students Union Union in order to bypass the Students Union.

• The additional formation of Warwick Students Sports Co-Operative, reducing the reliance on Warwick Sport, the first action of the Co-Operative will be to acquire the old Sports Centre.

• The removal of all number plates from club vehicles to prevent parking and speeding fines whilst on club trips.

As a club our finances this year have been stretched to the limit, obviously this needs attention, in order to improve our finances I propose the following:

• Anyone who loses club kit in a river will be live baited into said river and not allowed to return until they have found it.

• Increased connection with Old Gits bank accounts to ensure the financial stability of the club.

• The purchase of a club van to be used for trips to remove the clubs reliance on Midhire

• A comprehensive plan to “lose” two boats, apply for funding to replace them and then conveniently “find” them.

(The serious bit) 

Obviously the club doesn’t need comprehensive reform, but I do think there could be some things that I could implement, these are:

• A dedicated WWSR practice/refresher trip, a day trip to some river with the sole purpose of throwing lines at each other and rescuing boats.

• More transparency from the exec to the rest of the club.

Overall this is a club that I love, with all my friends doing something I enjoy and I want to ensure the next generation of Freshers has as good experience as I have. I love our pool sessions and our trips and it’ll be great to be at the forefront of organising them (not socials though, that can be delegated). Kayaking at uni has introduced me to a great group of people, from when I first met a lot of you during Welcome Week in 2018 to now where I’m running for Pres. I have seen my ability develop within the club and everyone that joined with me (and also spent copious amounts of money on kit). 

We’ve had a rocky end to this year with the virus, but I intend to make the best of it and run as many events as can be safely run, including using the discord for some virtual events.

Mr Grady Beckett 

Much like the legs of a cat in a traffic accident, this manifesto comes in three distinct parts: 

1. Safety equipment: The amount of weight in river equipment that we carry whilst on the river is ludicrous and surely unnecessary. I have therefore devised a system to mitigate this allowing for a more playful and enjoyable river experience 
2. Throw lines: Given that we only ever use the ends, the middle is surely 

redundant. I would advocate removing the middles and keeping just the ends (this policy could apply to straps, paddles, etc but I’m being realistic about the amount of change I can implement) b. Stern of Boat: I have never seen the back of my boat do anything other than 

catch eddy lines. I, therefore, advocate the removal of the back of all boats. This will give easier and safer passage down rivers for all ability levels c. BAs: The perfect safety net. They are like a warm and loving embrace, 

keeping you safe from the dangerous rapids ahead. They will be banned. They encourage risky behaviour like swimming. Instead, a club-wide abstinence policy will be enacted where you just say no to the water. d. Swims: You got yourself into this mess, you can get out of it. If you decide to 

swim them you have to get yourself and all of your equipment. It’s not fair that some poor soul has to go searching for your lost boat, paddles, leg, a flask of tea. Hopefully, you will learn your lesson for next time and not swim. 2. Environment: as a club, our carbon footprint is colossal. The following should help 

reduce this and bring us closer to the Paris accords one trip at a time. 

1. Travel: Given that, every time Bruce gets taken on a kayaking trip, we lose a Maldive, I would instigate a policy of paddling to all rivers we wish to run. Not only will this improve forward paddling in the club but also massively reduce the greenhouse gasses we produce. b. Plastic: The boats we use create considerable amounts of microplastic 

pollution as well as being only questionable recyclable. We would completely kit out the club with origami boats made of cardboard (for durability). c. Geese: The club has a lot to learn from the humble goose. I have never seen 

a goose capsize, the same cannot be said for most of the people in the club. I, therefore, advocate for a goose to be assigned to each member. The goose will take you under its wing and teach you how to do better. Not only will this bolster skills in the club but also provide employment for these noblest birds (they’re only acting out because they feel that the community has let them down) 3. Upwards mobility 

1. Freshers: To steepen the learning curve, sharques with frickin lasers attached 

to their heads will be released into the pool after rolling week. The true terror they will feel will really help motivate them to just roll b. Further to this, given that freshers are young and vibrant and fourth years are old and crumbly, If I am to be made president we will use freshers as river leaders. Their young and agile minds will see solutions that we fossilised folks just won’t, both on account of senility and deteriorating vision. 

Having seen my vision for the club, I am certain you will vote for the only candidate in this race taking things seriously. Vote Grady for your own Goose! 

Pebble III

Do you want this to be the future, vote for me a pebble for a strong and stable leadership (worked for Brexit, should work here)

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CANOE POLO

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Mrs Claudia Perry

At the beginning of my second year at university, I decided that I wanted to try something completely different to anything I’d done before. I kept being drawn back to the canoe clubs, so I rocked up to a taster session, not knowing what to expect (of myself or the sport), and my university experience has never quite recovered. One canoe freshers’ trip was enough for me, so I settled fairly quickly on the polo side of the fence (because after all, it is warmer playing in a swimming pool!!), and I am so grateful for the skills, but more importantly friendships, that I have made along the way.

The inclusive nature of both clubs is something I will ensure we maintain. One of our clubs’ strongest assets is the way we welcome everyone, regardless of ability, throughout the year. It’s certainly one of the reasons I stuck around!

This past year it has been fantastic to be part of a complete ladies team. I hope we can repeat the success of our first ladies taster session, at the beginning of both terms 1 and 2, to encourage female participation in our sport.

As president, in order to help all members to continue developing their skills throughout the year, I aim to continue the work of last year’s exec dedicating regular pool sessions specifically to skills and tactics. This will allow everyone to focus on improving their game outside of a pressurised match environment.

But don’t worry if you have a thirst for competition – we will also be entering national leagues again, not to mention hosting our own tournaments which went so well in our new pool this year!

So please vote for me for president!! I love rocks, but it would make me sad to lose to a pebble!!

Pebble III (again)

I dont know anything about polo, is it really a sport??? vote for me though is a vote for Canoe. Lets crush this club once and for all :P

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As part of pre-Scotland hype, we’ll be meeting in the Duck at 6:30 this Friday for some füd ├░┼©┬ìÔÇØ and drônk ├░┼©┬ì┬╗before meandering our way via Tesco’s to Canoe house 

This is open to everyone, not just Scotland peeps so feel free to come join the crew ├░┼©╦£┬ü

Much Social Love,

Cam, Owen and all those Exec persons

*********BEANIE PAYMENT*********

Good news for all you beanie lovers!!!! 

Our beanies have now been moved into production, and we have a confirmed price of £23.25

If you placed an order, the time has come to make your payment via this link:

https://www.warwicksu.com/shop/product/10182740/

Any questions feel free to drop me a message :)

Beanie love,

Claudia xoxo

Hey Everyone,

This week we will be heading to Skool Dayz on Saturday, we will be pre-ing in Westwood (Hampton) courtesy of Harris.

Tickets are still available at: https://tickets.warwicksu.com/ents/event/18533/

Hope to see all of you there!

PS: Don't forget POP! tickets for next week: https://tickets.warwicksu.com/ents/event/18530/

Social Love,

Owen, Cameron and all the exec